this is probably the most complicated dish of yer life!

pack a pipe and stroll through yer local market. the head we are looking for is not an average head -- look for signs of loveliness and intelligence! a slice of lemon in dear mount -- good! fluffy chicks -- zer excellente! maybe a sparc in the eye or a lovely ear may bring yer attention... demand that one and accept no other! them proprietors will only love you more and may as well throw in a carrot! things to pay attention to -- both eyeballs gotta be present and not blurry and sure you must be sure a tongue is also there -- good signs of freshness!

once you have acquired the head of your dreams -- make sure to become a happy owner of a gas lighter. burn all of them perky hairs off! burn them all away! as one of them rockie stars would say -- burn mafathaka burn!

once you are done enjoying the burning scent of the pig woman -- rub it with olive oil and be gentle as you know -- she's gonna burn! place the mamma head on the iron skillet and wrap them ears with the foil and be sure to make same to the schnuzzle! preheat the oven to say 250C and once it's all hot put your creation in for a chill!

keep it on for an hour and then drop down to 180C. and then after another three quarters of it hour remove the foil from the schnuzzle and another quarter an hour later take them off the ears and keep on for another quarter an hour.

yer head is ready!

here what i would recommend for them condiments.

teh sauce!

get a pack of fermented soybeans and shit from them chinese brothers and mix it with half the amount of crushed fresh chillies or even better them thai peppers and 2-6 cloves of garlicjans to taste. do not forget a spoonful of heavy soy sauce and perhaps even some cane sugar if you like. saure it all with a couple of spoonful of lime juice or chinese cook-wine. mash all with a masher of yer choice!


the drink of choice for this exqusette meal would be of course a bottle of good tequila and plenty of the lime juices. a generous amount of salt shall be used and a proportion of at least 40-60 is recommended.

teh head on speed by this thyme yer head must have cooled off from them hells bells and may look like this image on teh righteous! smile back -- it is impolite to goon down upon them things that soon become a part of yer empire! here it becomes the important part of surgical procedures for ingestions and digestions. make sure a proper music is playing like teh goo'ol carlos santana or say even better teh soothing poetry of garcia lorca!

at this point you will require a thin short sharp knife. there are about only few rules of cutting the head:

first you'd like to cut off the right ear and after deeping it in the sauce enjoy the crunch. share the other one with yer loved one. make sure you crunch together!

teh schnuzzle is abit more complicated as you have to break through the skins around the fourth tooth and cut only slightely over the upper lip. observe them vicious claws sticking on sides of both nostrils -- those might have had killed ya! you may consider giving the whole schnuzzle to yer loved one for it is full of schnuzz and you know it's a romantic jesture in many cultures of the world to rub them schnuzzles!

here it becomes the exciting time for those beautiful eyes! remove (or eat if you enjoy the crust) the skin from the upper schnuzzle and forehead and use a fork to desocket them eyes. share one with your loved one -- a visionary experience!

and yet it is the time to separate upper class fags from them tough pips of the streets -- pull the jaws apart until they break separate. you can see the tongue -- rip it out and peel the tough skin. shread slices of delicious tongue with your loved one!

here you will notice them breaks of them skull bones and yes -- it's them brainy times! gently insert yer blade into the crack closer to the back of the skull where them small lobes are and they will fall apart together with a piece of the early spine. there you will become of them yummy brains. use a fork or a spoon to pull them out and do not forget to share the fast acquired wisdom with yer loved one!

with scraps of meat off the side lobes and maybe some of the neck you are about done with todays excitement. the lovable chicks that are hang off the sides of lower jaw are a treat for tomorrow -- cold or refried they will provide a memorable experience for the whole family!

hope you have enjoyed your basic anathomy and hot cuttlery experience.

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